MISCELANEOUS

What did the Hurricane say to the coconut tree?

hold on to your nuts, this is ganna be a hell of a blowjob!

Whats the ultimate rejection?

your hand falling asleep while your whacking it.

What did Adam say to Eve?

you better stand back, i don't know how big this thing gets.

How do you make a kleenex dance?

blow a boogie into it.

What is blue and fucks old age prisoners?

hypothermia.

MAKING FUN OF WOMEN

Why do women have two holes so close together?

in case you miss.

What do you call a beautifull girl in Poland?

a tourist.

How do you know if a woman is wearing underwear?

look for dandruf on her shoes.

What is the definition of a vicious circle?

a cunt with teeth.

RACES AND RELIGION

Why do Iraquians carry shit in their wallets?

for identification.

Why do jews have such big noses?

air is free...

How do you save a drowning nigger?

you take your foot of his head.

Why wasn't Jesus born in the USA?

God couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Whats the definition of mass confusion?

father's day in Brixton

How do you brainwash a Irishman?

give him a enema.

Why don't nigers have checkbooks?

because its hard to sign your name in spraypaint.

Why did God give negros rythem?

to make up for their hair.

Hpw do you say "fuck-off" in Jewish?

"Trust Me!"

How do you get 27 Cubans into a shoe box?

tell them it floats

What is the capital of Cuba?

Miami

Why did the Irishman refuse to be a Jehovas Witness?

he didn't witness the accident...

How many blacks does it take to pave a driveway?

deepends how thin you slice them.

What happens when a Jew walks into a wall with a full erection?

he breaks his nose.

What do you get when you cross a nigger and a gorilla?

a dumb gorilla.

HOMOSEXUAL JOKES

Why did the gay get fired from the sperm bank?

he got cought drinking on the job.

How do get four gays on a barstool?

turn it upside down.

ANIMAL JOKES

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

because he was dead!

What do elephants use for tampoons?

sheep.

What is the brown stuff between a elephant's toes?

slow natives.

Where are a elephants sex organs?

on its feet, cause if it steps on you your fucked!